Archive for October, 2006

Cigar-Shaped UFOs

October 25, 2006

Pardon me if I already documented this elsewhere.  And before I begin let me state my own personal UFO religious affiliations.  I believe the universe is big enough to have other life out there than can use radio, lasers, and space ships.  Whether they have visited us in the last hundred years is, sadly, doubtful.  I can’t imagine it would be inexpensive for them to do so, so if they did, they would likely have a purpose in mind.  And I doubt they have a Prime Directive of non-interference (in the Star Trek sense), so I am pretty sure their presence would be obvious, and whether they meant to or not, their arrival would probably be disastrous for us (in the way that Europeans visiting Polynesia brought a de-stabilizing force, Or to America to displace the Native Americans, who presumably displaced the Neanderthals before them, etc.)

But hey, maybe.  But as to their being wildly smarter than us.. My feeling about an Alien Race that was so smart it could cure cancer, and yet refused to do so, is similar to my feelings about a God who would threaten you with eternal damnation for believing in some other god.  My vision of God is of a friendly force who just wants us to play nice with each other, and is not particularly concerned about how many friends he has on his MySpace page.  I expect that of my aliens, as well.  Unless they are just here to eat us, in which case I just remind them that we taste like chicken, and that chickens don’t know how to use radio, lasers, or SpaceShips, so they are a better choice for attack.  Hmm, wait a minute, cow mutilations… Are they just taking the Porterhouses?

OK, back to my story.  If I were a self-respecting alien, why oh why would I make my flying saucer “cigar-shaped”?  Giving them the benefit of the doubt and assuming their different biology would excuse the phallic references, it is just a silly unromantic shape for a flying saucer and I refuse to believe any UFO reports that include that reference.

Except that I saw some.

It was a long time ago now (which is why I am sure I told this story on line very recently and I apologize for bringing it up again).  I was in the back yard trying to appreciate what was supposed to be a really good meteor storm.  But I live in a light-polluted area and there was a bit of a foggy mist, so I could only see the very very brightest of them (one of which was actually pretty cool.  Actually had a greenish tint and I felt I could see some tumbling/spinning and maybe even heard a bit of a sound from it.  Not so cool if it had subsequently smashed into my house, of course, but enough to make me happy to have stood out in the cold for hours.

Anyway, sometime during this experience, I suddenly saw a fleet of metallic, cigar-shaped, glowing, UFOs flying in formation high above my house. It was just like in all the UFO reports and it left me dumbfounded.  Here was something I could not logically believe was happening, and yet it was.  It lasted less than a minute as some number of them zoomed overhead and then they were gone. It was amazing, and I hope everyone gets a chance to experience the sense of awe and amazement (did I mention it was amazing?) I did that night.

But in my heart I knew it couldn’t have really been UFOs and eventually I realized what it really was — Birds.

It was just a flock (formation) of birds doing their normal birdy acrobatic stuff as they moved towards their birdy destination.  I claim they were birds with whitish underbellies but dark wings, flying not as high up as it looked (hence they looked like much larger objects), illuminated from below (neighbor’s yard lights) and seen through a light mist (further obscuring any sense of their wings and making their illuminated bodies appear to ‘glow’ as opposed to just reflect light.

I’m pretty sure that’s what it really was, and not that I am just seeking an explanation. But my point is that even though I am fairly good at telling what a bird is normally, that at the time of the event they did NOT appear to be birds.  The illusion of their altitude and size made them non-birds, as did the glow and the lack of visible flapping wings.  But their actual behaviour was very bird-like and I appreciated that at the time.  Anyway, at the time of the event the whole thing just felt completely inexplicable.  It was… awesome.

Anyway, I generalize from that to claim that ALL cigar-shaped UFO sightings are actually birds.  (mixed with people’s odd ideas as to what shape a cigar is.  I think of a cigar as being cylindrical, but I accept lots of people consider them ovals.  Which I guess is more accurate than a cylinder, but it would be a very FAT cigar in this case.  But definitely not saucer-shaped.)